Dream Of Me
by Liz B
Summary: Set around five weeks after The Gift. (Contains Spoilers) A member of the Scoobies is risen and they and the rest of the gang including Spike have to resolve issues around it. A B/S Shipper Fic.
1. Gone

Disclaimers: All characters from the show do not belong to me – they come from head of Joss. Any others will be from head of me.   
  
Summary: Set a few weeks after The Gift. Set around five weeks after The Gift. (Contains Spoilers) A member of the Scoobies is risen and they and the rest of the gang including Spike have to resolve issues around it. A B/S Shipper Fic.   
  
Spoilers: Set after The Gift, so could reveal anything up to.  
  
Rating: I've made it PG13, for purposes of future content.  
  
Feedback: Please review and/or email me with your thoughts, its all very much appreciated.  
  
Distribution: If you want to place it on your site, please mail me to ask. This is my own original writing and I'm sure no one in fan fic world would try rip me off!  
  
Part 1 of Dream of Me  
  
  
His warm involuntary breath floated along her neck, making her spine tingle. She jolts her head a little, their cheeks briefly brushing. There they stood, she wearing simply his shirt and knickers, he in a simple pair of boxers. Her hand swiftly moves up to her shoulder, gripping it lightly, relaxing and letting her head lean back, her neck making contact with his shoulder blade. Her eyes closed she takes in the silence. He feels the embrace, his hands hanging loosely connected around her waist, his chest against her back, his bulge gently resting above her butt. His lips touch her fingers softly, and her hand drops, taking his in her own.  
  
"I love you."  
  
"I know..." He smiled.  
  
"No, you don't. You never did. You thought I simply treated you 'like a man'. You never saw that that man, that man I loved. And now it's too late. The moment passed. The moments gone."  
  
His eyes opened, a few tears falling down his cheeks. The moment was gone; they never even had it. It was never real. And it hurt him, more than anything did.   
  
"Just a dream... a soddin' dream." He wiped the tears away, and sat up. "If only I'd..." And there, he couldn't contain it any more. He hadn't sobbed liked this for a week. When Dawnie had confessed how lonely she had felt, and when he bit back to stop himself confessing the same feelings. At least he was alone now. No one could see his tears. They couldn't see the shell of a vampire he'd become.  
  
  
They stood there watching him. The little one wanted to go in, to tell him the good news. Buffy put her hand around her little sister. And watched. He'd kept his promise. She'd hadn't been gone long. A few weeks. But Dawn had recalled his treatment of her. How he'd done his best to look after her, to comfort her. Buffy's eyes glistened as her tear ducts let out the few tears which had been waiting to fall. But still... she wouldn't let him see her. She wasn't ready for that yet.  
  
  
"I should have protected little Bit properly, then she'd never have had to jump... and... and..." He stopped. He'd heard something. Through the tears, he focused, turning round.  
  
  
They walked away, both making very little noise. She still felt odd. At moments it had been as if she had never left, others as though she'd been gone an eternity. The sun was rising now, it had been several hours since she'd been brought back.  
  
"Buffy... " her sister began.  
  
"Not yet..."  
  
  
Nothing. The doorway empty. "What you did for me, and Dawn, that was real. And I'll never forget it." Vividly he could remember her at that door, as if it were yesterday. He wouldn't forget it either. Or her.   
Closing his eyes he sees her there. Forgets that it's not real. Reaches out... real.   
  
"Dreams aren't real. Get over it you poof. She's gone."  
  
  



	2. You Left Me

Disclaimers: All characters from the show do not belong to me – they come from head of Joss. Any others will be from head of me.   
  
Summary: Set a few weeks after The Gift. Set around five weeks after The Gift. (Contains Spoilers) A member of the Scoobies is risen and they and the rest of the gang including Spike have to resolve issues around it. A B/S Shipper Fic.   
  
Spoilers: Set after The Gift, so could reveal anything up to.  
  
Rating: I've made it PG13, for purposes of future content.  
  
Feedback: Please review and/or email me with your thoughts, its all very much appreciated.  
  
Distribution: If you want to place it on your site, please mail me to ask. This is my own original writing and I'm sure no one in fan fic world would try rip me off!  
  
Part 2 of Dream of Me.  
  
Their lips brushed over each other's, tongues clashing and fingers intertwined, they kissed like there was no tomorrow. Suddenly he morphed and his fangs were dancing over her lips, making little cuts and grazes, and he began to suck on them franticly. The blonde girl froze, the taste of her own blood in her mouth startling her. But he continued. Her mouth was now bloody, and her lips filled with so many sensations, pain, excitement, and fear. And she liked it; closing her eyes and letting their tongue meet, kissing in-between nips and sucks.   
  
"You taste good slayer." He whispered in her ear, only briefly pausing before gripping her shoulders in both hands and continuing to kiss and taste her.   
  
He had become hard; she could feel his erection pressing against her. She wouldn't admit it at first, not to herself, but she too had become aroused. The force he was using on her was a turn on, and it almost scared her, that she enjoyed it.   
  
She woke up breathless. It had surprised her she had even managed to get to sleep. Her first day back, her first few hours back in her own bed, and she had to dream of him. Like that.   
  
"Get it together Buffy." She said to herself.  
  
Looking around her room, it was exactly the same as she had left it. How she remembered it. She wasn't sure whether that comforted her or not.   
  
"Just get up… there's no point lying here, is there?"  
  
Quietly, Buffy got up and put on the first top and jeans she could see. Carefully she walked along the hallway, and peeked her head around the doorway to Dawns bedroom. Her sister was sleeping, well, barely. She was tossing and turning.   
  
"Dawn…" Buffy called trying not to startle her little sister. "Dawnie… wake up…" When her sister didn't appear to hear her she walked over and sat next to her on the bed, gently shaking her.  
  
"ARGH! Buffy! Don't! I…" Dawn sat up in bed and began to sob. Buffy quickly wrapped her arms around her.   
  
"I'm here Dawn, I'm here…"  
  
"But you left me… you left me…"  
  
TBC…  



	3. Empty Tears

Disclaimers: All characters from the show do not belong to me – they come from head of Joss. Any others will be from head of me.   
  
Summary: Set a few weeks after The Gift. Set around five weeks after The Gift. (Contains Spoilers) A member of the Scoobies is risen and they and the rest of the gang including Spike have to resolve issues around it. A B/S Shipper Fic.   
  
Spoilers: Set after The Gift, so could reveal anything up to.  
  
Rating: I've made it PG13, for purposes of future content.  
  
Feedback: Please review and/or email me with your thoughts, its all very much appreciated.  
  
Distribution: If you want to place it on your site, please mail me to ask. This is my own original writing and I'm sure no one in fan fic world would try rip me off!  
  
  
Part 3 of Dream of Me.   
  
  
Sitting there alone, Spike felt worse than ever. His dream had been the most vivid, the most poignant, and meaningful yet. The most upsetting, for it had taken him several hours to stop crying. That had been the longest since... since 'it' had happened. That day... night... he'd been uncontrollable... He'd sobbed for three days... 'Til he could cry no more. And it hurt that the pain had come back so badly. It hurt like hell.  
  
***  
  
"...Earth to earth... ashes to ashes... dust to dust... The Lord bless her and keep her, the Lord makes his face to shine upon her and be gracious to her, the Lord lift up his countenance upon her and give her peace. Amen."  
  
"Amen" He whispered in the shadows.   
  
Watching from the distance he'd paid his respects. Watched the people who barely knew her try to comfort those who loved her. But no one consoled him.   
  
When it was dark enough, he came out of the shadows, and had sat on his knee's there, in front of where his love now lay.   
  
He'd felt a small cold hand on his shoulder.  
  
"She did know Spike."  
  
He had just looked at the little one in the eyes. She had sat beside him, and they both just looked at the headstone that night. Neither able to utter another word.  
  
* * *  
  
The guilt made it worse. It wasn't just the fact he lost the woman he had loved. It was the fact maybe he could have stopped it. How he'd wished every second since that day he could have had a few more minutes. He could have got there in time, fought Doc properly, stopped him starting the ritual. Protected Dawn properly. Or even if... if he had been able to sacrifice himself somehow. He would have died for either of them - Dawn or Buffy - any day.  
  
The picture in his hand was all he had now. He'd burnt everything else in a rage. But this one picture, Buffy, sitting in front of Sunnydale High, he'd rescued.   
  
"I'm never going to stop loving you Buffy Summers. Even if you were a bloody slayer, I don't know what you did to me. But you did it good. Because here I am. Everything I despise."  
  
  
  
Buffy had been holding Dawn in her arms for some time now. When Dawn had started crying, she had too. She hadn't known what to say to her, how to apologise, for leaving her. Now she was back. It was only Willow, Dawn and she who knew. Undoubtedly Tara would by now... And Giles, would Willow have told him?   
  
She checked the clock on the wall. 10am. They may as well get up now anyway, it had been a long night - but they could catch up on sleep any night. Lost days they couldn't.  
  
"Dawn" she whispered, kissing her sister on the forehead. "I won't leave you again. I promise. But you know I had to." She swept the long dark hair from her sisters' face, it was entangled with salty tears, and her young usually bright eyes were red and her skin damp. "I love you Dawn, I hope you didn't forget that."  
  
  
"Dawn listen to me. Listen. I love you. I'll always love you. But this is the work I have to do. Tell Giles I... I figured it out. And I'm okay. Give my love to my friends. You have to take care of them now -- you have to take care of each other. You have to be strong. Dawn. The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live. For me."  
  
  
That's all she had thought about. Clung to. Buffy's words. Those past few weeks had been the hardest, no mum, no sister, and her future in uncertainty. Willow had been nice enough... but... She'd felt alone. And now, all her prayers had been answered. Buffy was back. But the only the thing she could think about was she shouldn't have left, and that she had to stay. At least she'd had Spike. She'd been able to talk to him; it had seemed he was the only one who had understood.   
  
"Dawn? Dawn?"   
  
"Uh... Oh," She focused her red eyes on Buffy's. "I... I know Buffy."  
  
"Now get up, and I'll make us some breakfast or something. I'm guessing a long day ahead, people to see right?" She smiled at her sister, trying to encourage one.   
  
"Yeah. I'll be down now." Dawn smiled back; hoping the tears would stay back at least until her sister had gone.  
  
"Ok." Buffy left the room, walking down her familiar hallway again, back down her stairs. Pausing before going into the kitchen, she stared at the sofa.  
  
So many memories.  
  



	4. Timing is Everything.

Disclaimers: All characters from the show do not belong to me – they come from head of Joss. Any others will be from head of me. Lyrics are sadly, not mine (I'd be rich) their by Dido and may be found on her album No Angel, or sampled on Stan by Eminem.   
  
Summary: Set a few weeks after The Gift. Set around five weeks after The Gift. (Contains Spoilers) A member of the Scoobies is risen and they and the rest of the gang including Spike have to resolve issues around it. A B/S Shipper Fic.   
  
Spoilers: Set after The Gift, so could reveal anything up to.  
  
Rating: I've made it PG13, for purposes of future content.  
  
Feedback: Please review and/or email me with your thoughts, its all very much appreciated.  
  
Distribution: If you want to place it on your site, please mail me to ask. This is my own original writing and I'm sure no one in fan fic world would try rip me off!  
  
  
Part 4 of Dream of Me.  
  
  
My tea's gone cold, I'm wondering why,  
Got out of bed at all.  
The morning rain clouds up my window,   
And I cant see at all.  
And even if I could it would all be grey,  
but your picture on my wall.  
It reminds me that it's not so…   
  
bad.   
  
  
Spike looked at his watch. 10:20. Not like he'd be able to go back to sleep now.  
  
"May as well go and check on the little one, see how she's holding up."  
  
He looked around, his crypt looked bare, except for her picture on his wall. He couldn't look at it. He grabbed his thick heavy duty black blanket, and the keys, and made his way undercover to the car.   
  
"Bloody sun!" He to himself getting in, blowing the tip of his finger which had started to burn as he had got in. "Oh well, it's happened worse." He started the car, and pulled out.  
  
  
  
Crunch. Crunch. Crunch. Dawn guessed she hadn't eaten for about three days, and these corn flakes were turning her stomach.  
  
"Buffy, I'm full."  
  
"You've barely had a few mouthfuls, I know it's not exciting but you have to eat."  
  
"I don't want anything." She flashed her sister one of those looks, a 'please don't make me' and it worked. Buffy nodded and took her bowl to the sink, as Dawn got up and walked into the living room.  
  
  
  
I drank too much last night, got bills to pay,  
My head just feels in pain  
I missed the bus and there'll be hell today,   
I'm late for work again,  
And even if I'm there, they'll all imply that I might not last the day ---  
  
  
  
"Depressing bitch" Spike cursed turning the radio off. It hadn't helped in improving his mood, and he hadn't yet figured out how to change the channeland he couldnt find a decent tape.   
  
Suddenly he stopped the car dead, right in the middle of the road.   
  
He looked in the window. Someone was standing there. He'd past everyday since it had happened and no one had ever been there at this time. He checked his watch. 10:30am. Scoobies would only usually take Dawn there after school for things. Who was it? He blinked. Between the blacked out windows and the net curtains – he couldn't tell. 'What if someone's robbing them?' he thought. He pulled over the car, right in front of the house. Grabbed his blanket, and got out of the car, running for the door.  
  
  
  
"Dawn I'm going upstairs, wait here and…"  
  
Through the door ran Spike, they'd left it unlocked. He ran straight into her, they both crashed to the floor, her head just missing the stairs, Spike lying on top of her, his eyes meeting hers.   
  
"What?" they both questioned simultaneously, neither quite knowing what had happened.   
  
Sunlight was pouring in from the porch, Spike fumbled to get up, but Dawn was already on it, she ran and slammed the front door closed. Buffy just looked up at him. It had happened in seconds, she hadn't expected him to just burst in. Spike was standing over her now, looking at her astonished. 'Is she real? Am… Am I dreaming?'  
  
'Spike. Great, perfect timing as usual.' Buffy thought to herself sarcastically. 'Really don't want to have to deal with this. What can I do? He's not saying anything.' She got up, pushing herself off the ground using her arms, then steadying herself on her feet.   
  
Dawn just stood there, next to the door. Looking at both of them. It was quite a sight. He looked at her as if she were… a ghost. She looked at him like she'd rather be anywhere else in the world.  
  
"Buffy?" He titled his head to look at her again.  
  
"In the flesh."  



	5. Unwanted Reactions

Disclaimers: All characters from the show do not belong to me – they come from head of Joss. Any others will be from head of me.   
  
Summary: Set a few weeks after The Gift. Set around five weeks after The Gift. (Contains Spoilers) A member of the Scoobies is risen and they and the rest of the gang including Spike have to resolve issues around it. A B/S Shipper Fic.   
  
Spoilers: Set after The Gift, so could reveal anything up to.  
  
Rating: I've made it PG13, for purposes of future content.  
  
Feedback: Please review and/or email me with your thoughts, its all very much appreciated.  
  
Distribution: If you want to place it on your site, please mail me to ask. This is my own original writing and I'm sure no one in fan fic world would try rip me off!  
  
Part 5 of Dream of Me  
  
His head still tilted he looked scrutinisingly at her. She had that same look on her face, he'd seen it so many times, when she was pissed off at him, didn't want him there. It was like she'd never been gone.  
  
***  
  
"What are you doing, Spike?"  
  
"What you mean, what am I--?"  
  
"Here. At this table. Talking to me. Like you and I are some kind of... talking buddies."  
  
***  
  
And so he stood there. Completely lost for words, just staring at her, lips slightly parted.  
  
"Spike… Spike?"  
  
He didn't hear her. Nothing was registering. This was impossible. They'd tried. They'd tried for days to bring her back. All of them. It had been their mission. What they had been so focused on, but they had failed. Their efforts went to waste, nothing had been able to revive her. Yet here she was. Standing in front him. 'This is a dream, it's a dream, I'm going to wake up…'  
  
"SPIKE!" Buffy shouted, slapping him across the face. "Would you stop staring already?"  
  
"Bloody hell Slayer!" Spike exclaimed, bringing his hand to his face, touching where here fingers had hit his skin. "Your back… for real?"  
  
"What does it look like? You're still invited huh? Let me make a mental note to get that fixed, save my back some damage."   
  
A look of pain registered on Spikes face. Her sharp remark had hurt him, she was at it already.  
  
'His face, oh god his face, I hurt him. Shut up Buffy your meant to your good at it. But he looks so upset. Focus, you're a slayer. You hurt vamps, since you haven' dusted him, a bit of emotional stuff is fine. It's mean.'  
  
'She's going to uninvite you again, you poof. Apologise!' Spike reminded himself to break the silence.  
  
"Sorry about that.. it's just… I saw someone was here… and I didn't know… and…"  
  
"Well now you know."  
"Yeah. I guess, I guess I better be off then. Don't want to get in the way…"  
  
"See you around." Buffy exhaled, turned and began to walk up the stairs. Spike watched her for a few seconds, then grabbed his blanket.  
  
"Spike…" Dawn began. He just looked at her, placed the blanket over his head and ran out to the car. He wasn't staying there any longer.  
  
However much he wanted to.  
  
  
  
Buffy watched her sister go leave the living room. She stood at the top of the stairs, feeling beyond guilty. 'Do I… no Buffy, that's sad… You didn't even thank him. You heard what Dawn said. He took care of her and comforted her. Weird as that sounds. But he's Spike. Exactly.' Battling her inner self, Buffy stood staring at nothing, contemplating whether to go and speak to Spike before he drove off. She knew she didn't have much time, he wasn't the type to linger. Or was he? She didn't know anymore.   
  
So slowly she walked down the stairs. Reaching for the front door handle, she paused… Til she heard the car start. She sprinted outside, she knew she couldn't let him leave now.   
  
SCREEEEEEECH. Spike stopped the car, just missing Buffy's bare foot.  
  
"What the hell is she doing?" he said out loud.   
  
Buffy stood, hands sprawled out on the front of the car, feet on the road, with the little stones between her toes, and suddenly wondered what she was doing. Questioned her self on what the hell she intended on saying. She couldn't even see him.   
  
She walked around to the passenger door. Opening the door and getting in quickly, to stop any sunlight. 'Why do I care?' she asked herself. Easily answered. Its Spike. 


End file.
